A. OUR PLAN
- Find out what people are scared of.
- Make people even more scared of those things.
- Develop products that protect people against those things.
- Sell those products to the people who are scared.
- Hire essay writing service to write about it
- Get rich as hell.
- Figure out the rest. (Maybe a boat or a movie deal or something?)
B. SUB-PLAN: WEAPONIZE “PC CULTURE”
- Connect the issue to the First Amendment.
- Treat any request for thoughtful speech as an assault on Constitution.
- Accuse people who want to use different words of being sensitive and whiny.
- Respond to everything they do by being sensitive and whiny.
- …Thereby using sensitivity and whininess as both a weapon and a shield.
- Find violent issues and blame them on people who want nicer speech, making PC
- CULTURE the cause of terrorism.
C. NOTES FROM BRAINSTORM
- Research bots. Make bots? (Ask Janet’s nephew.)
- Open-carry office?
- What are more fringe, dogs or cats?
- Figure out which “Star Wars” movies are anti-Trump, then boycott them.
- Hire 12-year-olds to make memes. (Again, could Janet’s nephew help with this??)
- Find out if the funny guy from “Silicon Valley” is liberal (would be a shame).
D. PERSONAL TO-DO’s
- Spruce up bunker.
- Send thank-you note to aunt Kathy (for the quilt).
- Brunch with my homies.
- Find people to be my homies.
- Figure out why I sweat through my shirts by 11am every day.
- Return pizza maker to Crate and Barrel (impractical in apocalypse scenario).
- Start bottling urine just in case.
- Find a writing expert
- Start online college.
- Lift weights – kettlebells?
E. BONDING EXERCISES (How is late October?)
- Ropes course weekend.
- Red ball, yellow ball, that’s not a ball – who told you that was a ball?
- American karaoke.
- Distrust falls.